*New Article* By Brigette Cormier
Ladies, look at the video above- do you remember this time? When being sexy felt powerful, and society reflected that respect back at you?
This video reminds me of a time when I equated feeling sexy to feeling powerful, and it seemed both men and women accepted and respected this, in my childhood innocence. Now as an adult, my mind equates sexy to dangerous, because I have first-hand experienced the toxicity of today’s man. Now I notice that when women feel powerful, and a man notices, it seems to shine a light on or expose his weakness to himself, which triggers his anger and thereafter desire to dominate women into feeling powerless and small, to “remove the competition” so to speak – and this is toxic masculinity.
Today’s man sees a sexy woman and assumes it means she’s asking for his abuse and domination, because he can’t handle the fact that she is not only powerful without him, but also more powerful than him. Patriarchy has not taught men how to grow their personal power, only take power from others. So today’s woman, who feels powerful when she’s sexy, has to make the decision between feeling safe and feeling sexy. Because according to patriarchy, which has birthed toxic masculinity, in today’s world, sexy women deserve men’s aggression. So unless you’re strapped 🔫, have a security guard, or have a human counterpart that is larger than the average toxic male aggressor, the act of being a sexy woman is an act of courage, bravery, and revolution.
The act of being a sexy woman is an act of courage, bravery, and revolution.
It’s a shame that today’s men attempt to dominate, compete with, and squash the power of women. This toxicity has been perpetuated within our society for so long, that we see women also reinforcing men’s aggression towards their own gender, criticizing and disrespecting the sexiness of their fellow woman, for male acceptance. With today’s woman reinforcing men’s desire to dominate and weaken the power of sexy women, these women internalize the toxic man’s opinions, squashing their own inner sexy woman, weakening their personal power, and forcing themselves to express their power through their masculinity which today’s man views that as acceptable because it’s not a threat to them. Women expressing themselves through their masculinity is not a threat to men because naturally, men do masculinity better than women. A sexy woman’s power through her femininity, though, is too much, according to the toxic man’s internalized beliefs. And so women continue to subjugate themselves to please men, perpetuating toxicity for future generations.
Today to be a sexy woman is a risky thing, because sexy women know that they are a target for today’s man. They know that today’s man is insecure and doesn’t feel powerful, and that he looks at the sexy woman’s power as a threat that he must squash. Through seduction, abuse, manipulation, disenfranchisement, today’s man continues to try to strip sexy women of their power in an attempt to take away the glaring reminder that they themselves do not feel powerful.
Today’s man attempts to reframe sexy women over and over again as a weak and needing to be dominated and crushed by men, through media and through social conditioning.
Everyone still sees the sexy woman as powerful. But because the weak men are so emboldened by the patriarchal belief that men’s lives are more important and more valuable than women’s lives, they feel it is their right to cut down sexy women and attempt to dismantle their power.
Men’s averse reaction to the sexy woman’s power is because the sexy woman’s power reveals to today’s man how inadequate his own personal power is compared to hers. And that makes him feel competitive with the sexy woman. Women, who have been subjugated and treated as property throughout history, have had to evolve to find their power, privately, amongst themselves – while men throughout history were handed the “power” without evolving, because patriarchy said so.
A powerful man and a powerful woman look and energetically feel completely different. They have completely different biologics, anatomies, hormonal makeups, etc. There should be no competition between the two. And yet, with the profound lack of powerful men in influential spaces, today’s man has limited examples of what it looks like to be powerful and masculine, without being toxic. Patriarchy has emboldened men to not have a need to cultivate personal power, because patriarchy teaches the man that he is dominant and powerful by default, by being born male.
Meanwhile, these same men can obviously see and feel the difference between their powerful presence and the powerful presence of a sexy woman, and that bothers them. And instead of going to the source of the problem, patriarchal societal norms, and holding it accountable for not teaching men how to cultivate personal power without abusing others, men turn around on sexy women and blame them, and demand they heel and submit, like a trained dog, so they don’t have to face the constant reminder that they themselves are inadequate.
With the existence of the internet today, there are many options for men to ascertain leadership and influence for how they choose to express their masculinity. As men begin to awaken to the fact that patriarchy has let them down and diminished their power, healthy masculine male leaders emerge. I applaud the few men that are challenging patriarchal social norms and leading men away from competing with women for personal power. I applaud the men in influential positions who promote protecting and honoring women, and who teach men how to grow their personal power through masculinity rather than through degrading and abusing the feminine, or mimicking the feminine.
As men awaken and seek out new male influence for a higher vibrational society, my tip for men in figuring out if a person is actually going to grow their power as a masculine leader or not, is to look at their beliefs about women. A powerful man is not threatened by a sexy woman. If a male leader blames women for men’s lack of power, or claims women need to change or “go back in history”, they’re not in their power, instead they are competing with women, which is unevolved and unintelligent. Because, I repeat, powerful man is not threatened by a sexy woman. A powerful man sees a partner, an equal opposite, in a powerful woman, rather than a future victim or someone to compete with.
A powerful man is not threatened by a sexy woman.
As long as men are competing with sexy women, the few who are not abusing sexy women, are comparing themselves to sexy women, and ultimately feminizing themselves in order to win the competition. Look at how many men now want to be called a woman, it’s because women have found their power and men want a piece of it. These men who decide to call themselves women have given up on evolving their masculine power and have completely leaned into feminine power, because women have figured it out and men haven’t yet. I find that these masculines who pretend to be women in order to feel powerful are lazy; they have given up on figuring out how to be powerful as a masculine, and patriarchy has disillusioned and emboldened these men to think they can do whatever they want, even pretend to be a woman. But just like how women cannot find true power through masculine expression, men will never know that feminine power that a sexy woman feels, their bodies are completely different. And the more a man leans into the delusions that toxic masculinity has emboldened him with, by audaciously pretending he can be in competition for feminine power with women, he moves farther away from a life as a powerful man.
Women have done the work for generations in order to grow their personal power, and now it’s men’s turn to awaken and evolve themselves. In the meantime, us women will continue to grow our power, showing up unapologetically sexy, and to no fault of ours, making men feel weak. I have faith that men will figure this out, and I hope this article helps.
Sincerely,
Brigette
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